Letting Go of Relationships that Aren’t Working

Welcome back to The Conscious Edge Podcast! I’m Alecia St. Germain, and I’m thrilled to have my friend Jonathan Dugger with us again today. In this episode, we dive deep into a topic that resonates with many of us: knowing when it’s time to let go of a relationship, personal or professional, and the often-complex emotions and rationalizations that come with it.

In my work with clients, this is often something that is avoided, sometimes to the point of causing serious financial and emotional harm. We hope that things will get better or tell ourselves that this isn’t the time to make a change. 

It brings up fear, feelings of unworthiness, and resistance to move forward in any meaningful way. That’s why we’re going to unpack how to recognize what’s really happening, and how to make decisions that serve you. 

Here are some of the things that come up in conversations with clients and how we talk about potential solutions. 

Recognize the Signs

We all know that moment when we realize a relationship isn’t working. It’s easy to push off dealing with it until things come to a head. Jonathan and I discussed how often people are aware of the issues but choose to ignore them until it’s too late. The first step is acknowledging that this isn’t something you will continue to tolerate.  

Excuses and Justifications

We tend to make excuses for not addressing problematic relationships. Whether it’s believing that the situation will improve on its own or being overly compassionate to someone going through a tough time, these justifications often lead to prolonged suffering. One of the questions I like to ask is “what am I telling myself about this relationship?” to really understand why I’m justifying what’s happening. 

Scarcity Mindset

I’ve been there. Making necessary changes can bring out our scarcity mindset. We believe we don’t have the time, money, or resources to find a better alternative, leading to a cycle of tolerating less-than-ideal situations. As Jonathan points out, it’s a way of giving ourselves permission to avoid making a better decision.

Fear of the Unknown

Fear, particularly fear of the unknown, is a major factor that keeps people in bad relationships. The discomfort of change and the uncertainty of what comes next can be paralyzing. We often tell ourselves that even if we make a change, we may not be in a better place. We use that uncertainty as an excuse to stay stuck and uncomfortable.

Practical Steps for Change

To navigate these tough decisions, it’s crucial to get clear on your needs and gather the necessary information to make informed choices. What are you no longer willing to tolerate? What would a good resolution look like? These are 2 questions that can help you get the clarity you need. 

Create Space to Evaluate

Clear some time on your calendar to focus and escape the I’m-too-busy excuse. It may not take as long as you think and it’s important to acknowledge that you deserve to address this for your own well-being and for the health of your business.  

Empowered Decision Making

Recognize your power as a decision-maker. Understanding that you have the authority and capability to make changes is essential for moving forward. It’s your responsibility to do what’s best for you and your business. It’s not on you to change another person or change yourself to accommodate them. 

I hope this episode provides you with insights and encouragement for addressing difficult relationships. Whether it’s about hiring a new team member or ending a personal relationship, recognizing the signs, understanding the role of fear and excuses, and taking practical steps towards change are key.

For more detailed insights and practical advice, tune into the full episode. And remember, you have the power to make the decisions that will lead to a healthier and more fulfilling life.

Sending you so much love and be well!

 

Resources: 

Next Key Services – Know Your Numbers

Episode 3 – What to do When You are Feeling Overwhelmed

Episode 6 – Why You Self-Sabotage 

 

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Hey there!

I’m Alecia – Certified Immunity to Change Coach, Soul Purpose Oracle, and founder here at The Conscious Edge where we help you get to the root cause overworking, perfectionism, procrastination, and all the other ways you self-sabotage and lead to burn-out.  We help you develop your leadership mindset so you can grow your business financially and make an impact.